Thursday, December 31, 2009

New Year’s voodoo magic

As a kid I was rather superstitious. Not like ghosts and curses, though I’d be damned if I engaged in a Wiji board or played Bloody Mary. I tended to look at the world through signs which would be there to indicate whether it was to be a good day or just an excuse for me to stay buried beneath my blankets.

According to this logic, 2009 should have sucked. There were break-ups of both the romantic and friend variety, career rejections and disappointments, shootings, lay-offs and tragedy, not to mention a regularity to my life, which at any other time would directly equate to monotony and angst.

If I was watching the signs, I would have taken spending five hours on the morning of New Year’s eve as a sign that 2009 should be damned and 2010 didn’t look much better.

Luckily, I don’t see the signs anymore and despite how many Facebook comments I read about 2009 being the worst year ever, and I realize that for many it was, I just can’t help but feel truly blessed when I reflect on my good fortune.

It has been the best year of my life. I feel like beaming, despite the exhaustion and the cold and the ridiculous duress of the gregarious stranger who tried and tried to extricate my car from the snow, only to be sent flying on the ice from a lack of traction after he worked up a shower’s worth of sweat, which flowed from his brow into his eyes as he meekly apologized that he did not think there was anything more he could do to help.

My friend Meagan and I have been talking a lot about PTC or present time consciousness. I think it is a term she picked up at some life coaching seminar. I think it just equates to being in the here and now. I told her that in 2009 I kicked the shit out of my goals. I had written them down and crossed them off, but I didn’t dwell in the future, as has been my tendency, instead reveling in the here and now. For that reason I don’t feel like I can take total credit for being a goal completing bad-ass. The universe played its part.

Okay, maybe part of me still is a little superstitious. Maybe it has just been a shift in the way I access that all that voodoo. No more looking for signs on why the world is out to get me. Instead I am putting my hopes and dreams for the future out into the universe and working hard to be open into the opportunities of life as they present themselves, taking stock in the fact that the signs from the universe are not in the annoying obstacles of life, like a car being beached on a block of ice but in the strangers that are willing to come from nowhere in an attempt to help you out.

I hope 2010 offers us all the opportunity to find our perspective and those moments that show us how blessed we really are.

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