It turns out the man of the hour is back at it again with clever tricks to land his prey.
She just received a notice that she was the coffee shop's customer of the month. Funny enough, the notification came from his private email not the business account.
Hollywood has made billions writing fictionalize versions of this same hair-brained scheme and female theatre goers everywhere have spent the better part of a decade swooning over it. I can't count the amount of times my girlfriends and I have left a multiplex complaining that no guy has ever made that sort of sweeping gesture for us.
I call it the 'Say Anything' Effect. Till the day I die, or it actually happens - and I am not taking bets on which is going to come first - I will compare every guy I meet to the idealized image I have in my mind of a trench coat John Cusack standing outside my window, boom box over head.
And yet, if it actually happened in real life, I think my gut instinct would be to call the cops.
So as cynical as I am, as occasionally man-hating as I might be, I have to give it to my girlfriend's stalker. He is a clever little bastard and moreover, he laid it all out there. He made the grand overture and while there is not a shot in hell it is actually going to get him anywhere - gal's boyfriend is going with her to pick up her prize - he is braver than I ever could be.
Now let's leave it there, little man or I am going to have to renege my high opinion of you and call in my boys in blue. They love playtime with heartsick stalkers.